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The Groundhog Day Factor

The Friendship Phenomena #4: The GroundHog Day Factor

Our relationships with our parents change as we and our parents age. Our relationship with a life partner changes – sometimes it survives, sometimes it doesn’t, but it always changes. Our relationships with our children change. This is necessary so that we can let them go, for that is our only inviolable responsibility as parents – to prepare our children for life without us.

Our relationships with our friends? Sure, some change. But with your truest friends, the ones you go deep with, the ones you’ve known forever and share so much history, or the ones you’ve met more recently, yet feel like you’ve known forever, these relationships don’t fundamentally change.

You know who I’m talking about. Our relationships may have blips, but the graph from a distance displays a strong, solid, unwavering line.

Line of friends taking a photo together.
Photo Source: Flickr N i c o l a

You can go years without seeing this friend, then one day you get the urge and you call her, and she says, “Hey, I was just thinking about you,” and you say, “That’s why I called,” and you pick up right where you left off. Perhaps there is some catching up to do, details to fill in, milestones to share. But soon you are putting all this new information into the context of your friendship, lapsing into your own language, making your lives lighter already, easier to bear, funnier, brighter.


Is it time to call your Groundhog Day friend? Let me know how it goes!

Girls talking outside.

In friendship,


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